My name is Magdalene, a 39-year-old woman. I have been married for 10 years now but all efforts to have a child for my husband has been futile and this makes me so sad.
Though my husband, Joshua does not show his concern on the outside, I know he too is not happy with the situation especially with his family and friends being on his head to send me out of the house and marry another wife.
As much as he keeps telling me that God will answer our prayers at the right time, I still feel very guilty and I know I am the cause of our childlessness even though tests carried out by doctors show that there is nothing wrong with any of us.
Why I say I am to be blamed is that when I was 22 and full of life, I got impregnated by my boyfriend and when I put to bed, he denied me and the baby and I had no option but to abandon the baby in front of an orphanage.
My parents had sent me out of the house when they discovered I was pregnant and there was no way I could have taken my baby home as my father had vowed to kill me if I ever brought a bastard into his home.
After abandoning the baby, I went back home and told my parents the baby had died at childbirth and after begging for their forgiveness, I was sent back to school while I blotted the sad memory from my mind.
But after the first three years of marriage with no child, I became worried and had periods of guilt. I did not put so much to the abandoned baby being the cause for my inability to have a baby.
But after seven years and no child was forthcoming, I became worried especially as my in-laws were on my neck to give them a child.
Last year, after doing everything to get pregnant failed, I secretly went to a prophet who told me that the baby I abandoned is the cause of my present predicament.
He told me that God revealed to him that the baby was adopted by a family and that I had to look for him and make peace before I can have a child for my husband.
Now the problem is that time is running out as age is no more on my side while my husband’s family are doing everything to make him either send me away or get a new wife.
I am in a serious dilemma at the moment. I don’t know where to start looking for my abandoned child.