The Importance Of Your Absence To People

Ever notice how much people take you for granted when you grace them often with your presence?

Ever noticed how you fade off someone’s fantasy when you grace them with too much affection and care?

Ever noticed how optional you become when you show your available button to the world all the time?
Ever noticed how less productive you become when you stay with the wrong people?

That’s how it is. Learn to grace people with your absence.

Not everyday “my friend needs me”, “She needs my presence to survive”, “we have an hangout”, “omo,clubbing things tonight”.

What exactly are you clubbing? Clubbing away your respect and dignity?

The very moment you leave that circle,their tongues will raise against you. They will talk about how that your ex boyfriend dumped you.

They will talk about how pathetic your love life is.
They will talk about your mother and how it is her fault her husband died cause she poisoned him to be sleeping around with one rich Alhaji,
They will talk about how you are on 2nd class lower because all you know how to do is “Shakara”
They will talk about how you grow 50-50 extra shoulder pads because your Aunty has dashed you Peruvian hair that she has rocked and rocked.
They will talk about how you soak your pants for 4days and still call wash-woman to wash it.
They will talk about how terrible your ogbono is, “Na only Nneoma sabi cook ogbono soup wey no dey draw”, talk about how there’s too much salt in your soup.
They will talk about how your brother is a drug addict and how his life and career has crashed down.
They will talk about the present boyfriend you have and how he spends on you,how you are not the creme-de-la-creme you’re forming to be.

They will destroy you,spiritually,mentally and physically.

Let’s not get this gist wrong, not every friend is bad, I mean there are the good ones out there, who are comrades, who will stand by you no matter the ‘bullcrap’, who will support you and scold you to your face, who will never speak ill about you and who will encourage and motivate you.

If you have one of these, you better arrange yourself if you’ve been acting up towards them in the past.
They are rare gems and funny enough, they are always available, but when they leave, you will be sorry.

But if you have all those friends, that do one or more of those horrible things listed above, friends wey be say na only clubbing dem sabi, to carry MTH403 notebook and solve questions,na issue, but to know wether Kim kardashian posed nude or not, or whether Rihanna’s skin is getting better or not, or whether CR7 got the life ban or not is their specialty, Aunty/Uncle, run for you life!

They are toxic objects you don’t need around or within you.

Be with people that inspire you.
Be with people of vision and class.
Roll with the high and mighty.
Be with people that show you how good you are not the other way round.
Be with people that do not point out your insecurities, but alas, grace them with the ocassional aura of your presence
Not everytime “Aunty I just came to greet you, do you have food at home?”
Not everytime” Debisi Haffa, you sabi tricia na?she don geh belle,i dey come your side come give you gist”.

Not everytime availability, sometimes ABSENCE.

Stay smart,stay scarce, stay Classy!



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