Happy Independence Nigeria!
male/female communication styles
Research proves healthy relationships start and end with communication. Notably, it is difficult to have any connection if you don’t know how to communicate with others – mainly the opposite sex, for our purpose today.
Men and women communicate differently. Part of it is biological and part of it is learned. When dating and mating, it is necessary to pay attention to what your partner is saying and honor the inherent differences of the genders.
These 10 tips will not only get you the first date, but they will lead to a second date and/or a long-term committment – if that is what you want. You may also find that your existing relationships with the opposite sex improve as well – from your co-workers, to parents, or your own children and siblings.
Read on and build better connections today! Do share this info with single, divorced or widowed loved ones! We can all benefit from words that unite us.
1. K.I.S.S.: Keep It Simple Sweetheart! Studies show that men use half as many words per day as women do. So, ladies, say it in “five words or less!” when communicating with a man. This advice came from the man of all men, Hugh Heffner. I now pass them on to you. If you want a man to hear you: “Say it in five words or less.”
2.Men like to be right.
This is for the “powerful women” out there! Coming on too strongly may threaten a man and cause him to withdraw. It is good to be a confident woman, but being a bossy woman to your romantic interest is not good. It gives a man the feeling of being a “lower-ranking male.” Being No. 2 to anyone is not a man’s dream, per se, and we don’t want to insult his manhood. We can gently guide a man but we shouldnt boss him around.
3.Stick to one topic at a time. Women find it easy to switch from topic to topic (since we can easily switch from left brain to right). This drives men crazy! Men, if you find yourself in this situation, discuss it with her and tell her that it is easier to understand each others’ message if she sticks to one topic at a time. Agree on this kindness and deliver the helpful message in a kind way.
4.Say it once! Ladies, when you need to say something directive to a man, say it slowly, clearly and calmly. Think about it before you speak, avoid saying things in anger, and “say it only once!” Men won’t hear us after the first time anyway.
5.Men are not mind readers! Men, if you become upset with the conversation, use a neutral tone, and say “Lets try to clarify what the main issue is to avoid confusion.” Sometimes, men can misunderstand what women say since men are very literal. It is likely that you are talking about two different things.
6.The Hen House Effect: When women get together, their talk may seem outrageuous to a man – women break all the conversation rules. Men talk in straight-line fashion – A, B, C, D. Women jump from A to D then L, with ease. So, ladies, we need to understand that there are times that we just wont make sense to a man, and we must try to be less versatile when talking to them. Men need to respect the amazing female mind and not get annoyed by it. Men and women are wired differently. What matters is that we get along well, or life wouldnt be any fun.
7.”How was your day, Honey?”: At the end of a long work day, most men have to come home and decompress. Most women want to get on the phone the second they get in the car and talk about their day. It is very important that women let men have some space. Women yearn for one-on-one face time and ear time. Men should set up some talk time later with his lady after he relaxes a bit. We all need to make sacrifices for each other; thats dating and relating. There are benefits, too! Men, those 15 minutes of catch-up time you devote soley to your woman may be very rewarding later in the evening!
8.Expect interruptions: Men may interrupt more than women, as it is their way to show interest; while women may nod and smile to show she is listening attentively. Again, we are just different. So, ladies, if he interrupts you, realize it may be just his way of showing you he is actively involved in your conversation. Don’t automatically assume he is being rude or domineering.
9.The Zombie Effect: A man can sit in front of his TV or computer and literally tune out the world. Men can be so uni-focused that they simply can’t hear a woman’s voice – or can they? Is this an example of selective hearing or is it biological and part of their left-brain functioning? The answer is, we will never know! Yet, we must somehow honor it and do what we can to understand that they can’t help it. Learn new creative ways to get their attention.
10.Keep your sense of humor! Gender “wars” can be very entertaining. Love your differences. There are some cool benefits to our biological differences, so enjoy them all.
ABOVE ALL, MAKE SURE THAT YOU HAVE FUN WITH YOUR DIFFERENT COMMUNICATION STYLES.